


Standing right in front of you

by Notdeadyet6



Category: jacksepticeye
Genre: Attempted Suicide, Death, Drinking, M/M, ghost au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-11-28 08:26:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18205985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Notdeadyet6/pseuds/Notdeadyet6
Summary: Henrik is dead and now Chase is alone, or is he?





	Standing right in front of you

Chase always hated funerals. Not just because someone died. It’s the layers of makeup covering the clear hole in a person’s head, the peaceful expression, the slight bit of blush they put on the person’s cheeks, and all the little things people do to make a dead person seem alive, that make him hate them.

Another reason Chase hates funerals is everyone’s pitying looks and meaningless words. The way everyone slightly turns to look at him when the pastor asks if anyone wants to say anything.

“Is everything okay?” No everything is not okay, that’s why people are crying. “We’ll move on eventually, it’s what he’d want us to do.” He’s dead, he can’t want anything.

The worst thing about funerals is looking into the coffin and seeing a man you’ve spent your entire life with. The man who stole your heart and will now be buried with it. 

He asks for a moment alone and everyone leaves without question, because that’s what you do when someone asks to be alone with a dead body.

“So this is it.” Who is he talking to, it’s not like the body can hear him. “The last time I’ll see you, Henrik.”

The hair raises on the on the back of his neck and he gets that feeling in the back of his mind that he’s being watched.

“I thought I asked to be alone,” he said then turned around to find no one there.

He scratches the back of his neck and looks back down into the coffin. There’s a few things in the coffin, old books, a bottle of liquor, a stethoscope. What’s he gonna do with that? Check a ghosts heart beat?

“I know you were never a religious person but I hope if there’s an afterlife you end up in the good one not the bad one.” It sounded stupid, but he didn’t have anything else to say.

That’s a lie and everyone who’s lost anyone knows it. There’s a million questions, and jokes, and stories, he wants to ask and tell, but now they’d just fall on deaf ears.

Again that feelings of being watched returned and his shoulder felt cold, like the air conditioner suddenly turned on. As far as he knew this church didn’t have an air conditioner and he was still alone.

As soon as he turned around the cold feeling disappeared. He looked around the room for anything that could’ve caused it, a hole in the ceiling, a partly opened window, but there was nothing.

Still that feeling persisted and it kept him on edge.

Before he had much time to think, the funeral was ver, Henrik was shoved into the ground and Chase was driving himself home.

It’s odd, he thought he’d feel more devastated, guess the whole shock and sadness wore off after he first found out about the accident. Now he just felt a numb hole in his heart.

That numb hole seemed to grow bigger each day, as well as the number of odd occurrences.

When I say odd occurrences I don’t mean losing your keys or forgetting where you placed something, I mean finding your laundry that you haven’t done in a month, clean and folded on your bed and finding breakfast made for you after you get up.

Like any normal person, Chase was weirded out and disturbed, but as time went on he just chopped it up to him starting to lose his memories. Maybe he should see a doctor. How common is Alzheimer’s at his age?

The weird occurrences didn’t distract him from the ever growing hole, nor did it stop all the what ifs Chase had floating around his head.

He’d had feelings for the doctor for a long time, everyone, except for him and the doc, have probably known for a long time. What if he’d realized sooner? Maybe if they’d been together, these what ifs wouldn’t hurt so much.

Or maybe they’d be worse, with what ifs about a life together flooding his head instead.

God, he’s what ifing his what ifs.

The what ifs overpower his rational thoughts and he does something he’s not too proud of. After years of staying sober and not binge drinking, he chugs a bottle of vodka until he passes out.

But before he passes out he stumbles into the kitchen, his mind in a blur, unable to think about what he’s doing. He has a knife in his hand now. When did he grab it, who knows?

He aims the knife over his chest and then he feels like he’s been slapped across the face… darkness.

Is this what dying feels like? Just an endless darkness? Wait that can’t be right.

He awakens on his kitchen floor, his back feeling like he’d slept on rocks and his head ten times worse. Chase wanted to just lie there on the floor, but his headache wasn’t getting any better so he forced himself up.

On the counter he found a glass of water and a pill that he didn’t remember setting out, which made sense considering how much he drank, but knowing himself he wouldn’t be smart enough to do that. Still he took it a went to lie down on the couch and wait for his hangover to pass.

Three weeks after Chase binge drank and he still has no idea how, when, and why he stabbed a knife into the wall. Said knife is still stuck in the wall and is jammed against something and Chase doesn’t want to damage his wall or call a professional.

Along with that, he also forgot multiple times, to book a therapist appointment and yet he still had one booked. Maybe he should look into memory loss.

He goes over to the fridge to make a morning snack when he finds a sticky note on it.

It reads: “Remember to make a trip to the store.”

It’s not all that weird, Chase leaves notes for himself all the time, but that’s not what bothers him.

The handwriting. It’s not his. The sloppy yet professional look. The little loops on the Ls and Is. It’s impossible.

Yet here the sticky note is, written in Henrik’s hand, a note reminding him to eat. He’s reminded of old times when Henrik would text and call him everyday to make sure he eats, well not really old days but they feel like such a long time ago.

A thought comes to him. It’s a silly thought, but he doesn’t have any better ideas or anything better to do.

That night he steals an Ouija board from Marvin. He’s senn what Marvin can do so it’s to too farfeched that he might be able to contact the dead with this thing, is it?

With everything set up he begins. He carefully sets his hands on the little triangle piece and almost has a heart attack when it moves.

H-E-L-L-O C-H-A-S-E it spells out.

It’s impossible. Maybe he’s just going insane.

He chokes back a sob that forced its way up his throat.

H-E-N-R-I-K ? it’s a long shot, but…

The piece moves over the yes.

He pulls his hands back and whips a tear from his face. For a split second he can see a figure in front of him.

“Henrik!” he says out loud, reaching for him. He can’t feel him but the air is slightly colder in that area.

He sobs as he slowly puts his hand back on the triangle piece.

It moves again.

I-V-E M-I-S-S-E-D Y-O-U V-E-R-Y M-U-C-H

Chase uses his free hand to muffle another sob. He shuts his eyes.

“So have I.”

A feels something cold press against his cheek.

He still can’t see the doctor, but he can tell where he is.

A tear is whipped off his face.

“I’m not leaving you again.” He hears Henrik say out loud.

“Where have you been?” Chase squeaks.

“I’ve been standing right in front of you.”


End file.
